He said she said

I apologize in advance for this post. This is not what I want my blog to be about, but I feel I can't sit here and take what has been thrown at me.
I have never used this blog as a forum to launch a smear campaign against people. Yes, I've complained about my job and my supervisors, but I didn't name names and I'm pretty sure nobody even associated with them read my blog. I don't set out to humiliate people. My other reason is that I know I'm not perfect. I know that before I say things about other people I need to look at myself.
Yes, there are things about me that could change for the better. I have the tendency to put things off until the last second, and those things that I think will be unpleasant for me I will put off until even longer because I stupidly hope they will go away. This is why I have avoided doing this, because it is a pointless game of back and forth. You did this, I did that. Please world see that I am the better person because of what has been done to me.
I don't blame my life on other people. I never have. I suppose some people could see it that way because of things I've said in frustration in the past, but I take responsibility for my life. I'm the one that got married in stead of going to college. I'm the one that had kids early instead of going to college. I'm the one that chose to stay home with my kids as much as I could instead of working all the time. Sometimes I had to work, other times I was able to stay home. I agree that in staying home the majority of housework should have been on me, but I also admit that I suck at it. I'm good at being a mom, but I'm no good at being a house wife.
For the record, from the time I got married, here is my job history:
In Turkey there were few jobs available for military family members, even less for a 19 year old just out of high school with little job experience. But I put in my applications and waited. And waited. In the meantime I volunteered once a week at the vet clinic. I did real work there. I assisted in exams, cleaned up messes, gave shots, got scratched, scrubbed cages. Then a job at the child development center became available. Then I got pregnant. About that time my hours at the cdc were diminished, and my choices for child birth in the area did not appeal to me. My sister offered to pay to babysit her kids, and my mom offered up her spare room, and Ft Lewis had an excellent Labor & Delivery ward. So, I went back to Washington, this was a mutual decision.
After Joey was born we moved to Ft. Campbell. I spent my days with a new born and unpacking and setting up our house. When Joey was 9 months old it became apparent that we needed a second income, so I went and found work. Another daycare center. After a few months internal issues at that day care center made it a volatile place to work. I developed stress related medical issues, so I gave my notice and found a new job. I was only without work for a week. Then we moved to Germany. Again a place with few jobs for spouses. Even less than in Turkey. No cdc, no commissary, no px. But I had another baby on the way, so I would be busy enough. But I was offered a job at an international preschool. My kids were able to go for free since I worked there. It was across the street form out apartment, and I really liked being a teacher. It was a great job. When the director saw me during a visit back to Germany a couple of years ago, she tried to offer me the same job again, so I think I was good at it. I worked there right up until we moved again. In New Jersey it was now apparent that any job I could get would not offset the cost of child care. We would have to pay before and after school care for Joey, and full time care for Mackenzie. But when Mackenzie was able to go to full time preschool that was subsidized (free), I got a part time job. I was still there to see them off to school, and there when they got home. It was a great situation. Then came Joel. I didn't work when Joel was young. Well, except for when I was in Washington while Mike was in Drill Sergeant school. And then I worked part time and only because my parents were able to look after my kids. But I stayed home the whole time we were in Columbia because that is what made the most sense. We couldn't afford all the child care expenses that would be necessary if I worked, and because of Mike's schedule, alternative work schedules (like 2nd or 3rd shift) were not an option either. So I chose to stay home. To say I was lazy is an insult not just to me, but to all stay at home moms. I felt blessed that I was able to stay home and take care of my kids. Yes maybe my house wasn't spotless, and maybe we ate frozen foods more often than not, but my kids were well cared for. I saw them off to school, helped with homework, volunteered at the school, drove everyone to dr's appointments, sports, and other activities. Not to mention I was going to school at the time, pulling off a 4.0 gpa. I have always been my children's primary care giver and I am proud of that.
What I'm getting at is, people should get their facts straight before they try to diminish what I have done with my life. And those that live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. I don't blame my life circumstances on anyone else, I am not a victim. If other people want to be victims, that is fine, but to say that I am the cause of where your life is gives me a lot more power than I actually possess.